Okay real talk. I know it sometimes sounds like I portray elopements like rainbows and unicorns, and yes, I think of our own wedding as the most perfect day in history that ever happened, ever. But, the reality is, there are some real and potential down sides to eloping and it is only fair that you make an informed decision in regards to this super important life-changing event. There are real and potential sacrifices that you will have to make when having an intimate wedding. Basically, the goal is to walk away from this day with no regrets or what-ifs at the back of your mind. Here are a few points to consider:
Your family. You may offend and disappoint family members whose opinions and feelings really matter to you. I have mentioned before that it was difficult to tell my dad he was not going to have the memory of walking me down the aisle, something I had to give up as well. My elderly grandparents would not get to share in the joyous day. And I would be left wondering if every passive-aggressive comment from my mother was a sign she was still punishing me for not letting her go dress shopping and drink champagne while getting our hair done. The honest truth is I am genuinely sad to not have some of these experiences, however, it has reminded me of the fact that I should not rely on one day to make sure my family knows how much I love them.
Your wallet. Just a simple Google search will display the numerous elopement hotel and travel packages available nowadays. Intimate weddings are becoming a little trendy and businesses have taken note of that. While some offer fairly reasonable packages a lot are taking advantage of the fact that you are making emotional decisions. You may choose to elope for economic reasons and still end up paying more than you bargained for if you are not careful. You can get a beautiful bouquet of flowers that are not a “wedding bouquet”, you can find a perfect white dress in store or online that does not have the “wedding dress” markup. Be a savvy shopper and do your homework.
Your partner. Well, this seems like an obvious one but let’s get honest. What are your reasons for eloping with this person? Is it because a small celebration of your love is more true to who you are as a couple? Or is it due to lust? Or because of the disapproval of family members. Anyone of these reasons isn’t a deal breaker, but maybe a trigger that you need to reflect a little more on your motivations. Having the maturity to have this kind of tough conversation with your family is a good indicator you have the maturity to make this decision.
Your expectations. You may have a super romantic idealist vision of your wedding day. And all of your dreams may (hopefully) come true, but they may not. When problems happen you will not have your mom to deal with vendors who don’t show up, and you won’t have your maid of honor’s shoulder to cry on when you hate your makeup. Be prepared to make decisions fast and assertively. And use the opportunity to support each other through any of the troubles so they can hopefully be a funny blip on the map of the BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE!
Okay, that is enough of the Negative-Nancy talk, but its only fair to look at any decision from both perspectives. Do you have any elopement considerations you have experienced? Leave a message below or send me an email so we can share your story!